Monday, December 19, 2011
By Jon Slone
So I purchased a King-Size bag of M&M’s the other day (One of Mack’s favorites) and I noticed that it didn’t actually say, King Size on the package anymore. Nope, the replacement slogan reads, Sharing Size.
Yeah, cause that’s what’s going on now….lots of sharing!
As the obesity numbers in America have climbed to a staggering 66% (Men, women and children combined) it is glaringly apparent that we’ve been buying the Sharing Size to do just that!
If that big bag of M&M’s is called the Sharing Size, what do they call that large drink at the movies?
The, Gain-Six-lose-six? (Gain six pounds. Lose six dollars)
The, I’m-gonna-share-this-with-everyone-in-the-audience-cause-I-like-drinking-after-complete-strangers size?
Make no mistake about it.
Sharing Size is on the package to not pelt the feelings of the corpulent customers as well as to peddle a lot more M&M product.
Store Clerk: Hey Ronald, I see you’re buying six bags of the King Size M&M’s today.
Ronald: Actually they’re called Sharing Size now.
Store Clerk: Right. Plan on doing some sharing are we?
Store Clerk: Riiiggghhhttt.
Ronald: Hey, it could happen!
Store Clerk: And I’m sure it will Ron, I’m sure it will.
Jon don't eat the red ones Slone